The Common Stages of Romantic Relationships and How to Work Through Them

Despite the challenges all relationships ultimately face, many people are willing to work hard to keep their relationship strong for the love, support, fulfillment, and a sense of purpose they provide.

Along with their common challenges, most relationships also go through the same three stages:

Romance/Rejection

When a couple is getting to know each other, this first phase is characterized by falling in love.

Despite this period being a time for learning about each other, some partners still hide parts of themselves - such as bad habits - to avoid rejection or conflict.

Trust/Disillusionment

This second stage is marked by a couple sharing more things - whether their money or living space; these are common sources of disagreements.

At this phase, even when partners agree on almost everything, the excitement and newness of a relationship can wear off and cause feelings of doubt and questions about trust and reliability.

In other words, love isn't enough. Couples need to enjoy being together, and those who build trust and get over their differences can grow together.

Adjustment/Separation

Breakups, separation, or divorce are all potential outcomes for couples who grow apart after the second stage. While some partners may not officially separate, they can still separate and withdraw emotionally, leading to resentment.

For couples who stick together, this third phase is about adjusting, where partners learn to accept each other's differences and negotiate needs to show their love, loyalty, and companionship.

In other words, they see each other as human beings that they love and respect - not someone they lust over or idolize, and certainly not someone they resent. Getting to this place is a significant accomplishment and essential to maintaining healthy relationships dynamics through any future conflicts.

Despite what stage you and your partner may be in at this time, if you have any unaddressed challenges that are causing tension or conflict, a couple's counselor can help you learn to communicate effectively and negotiate healthy solutions.